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  • Writer's pictureFreya Blom

November Insights

Updated: Jun 5

1. "New Years planning - why the time is now"

Disclaimer! By raising this topic I am not suggesting you overwhelm, restrict, or generally overload yourself. I am in fact suggesting you do the opposite! So often, we load our New Year planning (if we do any) with (sometimes quite harsh!) goals - which are often really expectations and unfair pressure in disguise. We often critique ourselves for not having started/finished/accomplished the things from our last plan. It is all too much. Please know that planning need not be restrictive at all. The best approach is to create a plan that is kind and fair, sustainable and realistic, that is honest, and honours your truest priorities. We live in a very reactive culture, and a good plan uses proactivity to install healthy boundaries, turning reactivity into flexibility.

Because I am so passionate about how we spend our (finite) time - and because the world is so full of volatility and uncertainty and hustle and self-judgment and unrealistic expectations, I have decided to run a free masterclass called "Pre-Install your year". It is going to be a working session, where we will cover off useful strategies, enjoy some mindset and perspective shifts, and excitingly - we are going to use this protected time and space to run a working session where I will guide you through a review of your 2022, and a simple process for creating a plan for Pre-Installing 2023.

You will gain:

- greater perspective on planning

- insights into your unique ways of operating

- clarity on your overall priorities and best next steps

- the ability to run your own annual review and pre-planning process for evermore

You can read the full article on my website, or can sign up to attend here

2. "If you follow the classical pattern, you are understanding the routine, the tradition... you are not understanding yourself." - Bruce Lee

The classical pattern as Bruce puts it, is very useful information. It shows us where to tap, where to push, what to let go of, and what to ignore. The key thing we forget is that it is only part of the blueprint. It provides some strands for us to use, but not enough to truly weave our own true way of living.

Not many people in this life have the resourcefulness and/or the resources to live entirely outside of our societal systems. So for the majority of us who need to be able to at least interact with society, I favour the approach of really understanding the "classical pattern" of living, with the intention of then being able to see what is actually ours and what has been thrust upon or ingrained in us that is not our own. There are always ways and places where we can either bend or integrate things (assumptions, internalised rules, etc) to better fit us or step away from them in ways that don't jeopardise our actual safety.

A lot of the work we do in coaching is discovering hidden patterns and using them to move toward deeper understanding and taking more aligned action.

As Picasso said, "learn the rules like a pro so you can break them like an artist".

3. "Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously." - Prentis Hemphill

Do you know how it feels to not know what you like or want because you have not had the space to explore and determine these things? Do you resent the amount of demands placed upon you, and the lack or care or thought for how YOU are? I came from that place, and that is why boundaries are a major part of my work. I didn't realise at the time that it was down to people pleasing (aka people controlling) and taking inappropriate levels of responsibility for others emotional wellbeing. I worked on things and went from exhausted, strung out, resentful, hyper critical and harsh with myself, to enjoying respect, adoration and love from myself. That fundamentally changed everything around me. It is entirely possible to learn not only how to construct and uphold healthy boundaries, but to live in deep alignment with what you want and need. Like pretty much anything of value, it takes commitment, time and energy.

P.S...Here are three more ways you can experience my work... 

1 - You can sign up for my monthly newsletter "Insights for Impact here" 

2 - If you use Instagram, you might like to follow me for useful quotes and inspiration

3 - If we have a mutual connection and you would like to experience my work, ask them to introduce us via email! 

I love to connect - please do leave a comment or share with someone you think this might benefit.

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